Not completely turned off yet!

sometimes, i think.

yeah, i do.

yeah, yeah. ok. but i still do.

well... at least... well... i think i do... does that count?

(in)Security

Ever tried an online auction for something you've got and don't want anymore? Well, don't. Do the old-fashioned thing and sell it at a loss at some shop near you, instead.

There's eBay, which suspends your account when you create an ID. Reinstate? Requires a photocopy of what you submitted to the visa guys the last time you tried to go stateside. Safe? Wana bet?

Hurts. That for all your trust in nameless faceless groups of people online, your own trustworthiness is considered suspect. And why? Policy won't allow them to say!

Beholder's Eyes

You can't settle for a woman who bores you or fails to stir your blood, no matter how fair her face.
But how can you hold the interest of one more behind than beauty?

Phoenix

Yep, risen. Ashes, even sackcloth might have been. But no more. Now it's bright bird with sparky tail.

Tigger!

wish I'd known of this. You'd think they could advertise...

But anyway, such are prelim. results. Disheartening at best.

Been sad since India blocked our interaction, bloggo baby. But now I'm here, never fear.

Just

Just to keep things alive.

Look at justice and freedom and the "Indian way", which is down n down n down...

They say I'm great at what I do, shake my hand, offer the meaningless platitude by the bushel. Pay? Nickels. Power? None, they bring someone on board to "supervise".

So much for this stint. I'm off.

Overheard in the cafeteria:

You make the curd-rice I'm eating taste Gooood
Thwack!

Really happened, folks. So some people do watch movies, eh?

Life offers you many moments to comment on. Pity not everyone spends their time only commenting.

Much A Do About... Everything?

Someone once attended a wedding and thought it a great idea to get a take-home gift. And here we are saddled with coconuts to this very day.

Someone once thought the sari should be nine yards long. And woe to the bride who's too sleepy to make all those yards stick!

Someone once thought... well, actually, a lot of people still think... that weddings are parties. Ho hum.

Talkative Spirit... or Habit... or the Weather.

Hey! Been a while!
Yea.

Wot u been doin?
Nothin much.

Quiet, arentcha?
Yea.

But why?
Donno.

Steppin On

...And all those mails n wishes n calls...

Now here's wishin ME a very happy break to usher in 2006!!!

Blah

So much for cheer n chips.

Christmas happened, cooked like one possessed, ate like the half-starved.
And so?

New Year's coming, will meet friends n party, and meet folks n be nice.
And so?

Ho hum. The seasons change n enthu drops to all-time low. Is this what they call a hangover, I wonder?

Rebellion Avante!

http://www.buynothingchristmas.org/

Yes, well. And how exactly do you sell this to a peoples who haven't had a gift in years, haven't been able to buy their kids any? This may be the only chance they have to sit in a warm church and get someone else's old winter boots.

So, Canada, back to killin cows you don't need to avoid dropping price?

NYC

Sigh. Can't sleep. Too damn quiet. Snowing too much, too.

Spent all night panning dustbins 'coz the handouts were so few yesterday. My prime spot in front of the subway exit, too. Fought for that spot, fought hand and tooth with that monkey with the black muffler and his sidekick. They wanted it, they wanted it to raise a little more for the bottle. But I got it! I did! I bit and scratched and kneed one in the groin... took the other one out with a sideswing Tyson would envy.

Ah, but what's the use. Not gonna get a groat the next few days if the newspaper boy's to be believed. Seems the transit workers ain't getting three years of money... they're scared to survive on two. Two YEARS, that is. I wonder if I'll last two days, as things stand.

Holiday season. Everyone's snuggled up pretty right and tight I bet, in their fancy suburban homes. And they're going to save a packet, too, they won't have to do their fancy shopping and parties til the strike's off. By which time... I wonder...

How many nickels in a billion dollars? The boy says city's going to lose more'n a billion dollars if this lasts a week. Bothersome, numbers. If Da had had his way, I'd have had me fancy bungalow and nodded sadly at the loss, too. But I can't. Understand what they're nodding about, that is. Got no idea what they're all talking of. When do I get my next nickel, that's what I ask.

New York City. Lovely place in the winter.

...And once again, one falls all the way in love. Here's to good whisky!

New Stuff

How'd she put the angular hairpin?

"Protection"

Take some time over spell-checks in the mail.
Look both ways before you cross the street.

...And always wear galoshes when swishing in yesterday's rain puddles. You never know what memories catch you unawares.

Space

Very relative.

slow wind-down... like a doll with noone turnin the key...
the week's worth of excitement packed into the first half,
the rest I must limp through with all the finesse of a wet noodle...

So too is it when life takes a flying leap.

I Could Sing those... Dreamy Blues...

All coz the weather's changed and there's a nip in the air. And the quilt's come out of storage.
And also coz... well, the weather's changed and the air's quite a bit nicer, too.

Time-off

Tired and sleepy and drained.

Week off in Bangalore. Lotsa whisky, wine and song.
No sleep, though.
Then maniacal work to make up for week off in Bangalore.
Then weekend. With local chapter of whisky and song.
Still no sleep.

Gonna take a little boat into the ocean...
Gonna see the seagull scream and swoop...
Gonna lie back and watch the cloud castles build...
And fall fast asleep.

Iridescence

Colors. Lotsa them. Swirlin together.

Some dreams gather them up and give them to you. And some days you can't wait to wake up from your dreams, coz you know you'll see the colors gathered up for you right here in the real world.

To people who find me colors. Muah!

Go Home!!!

Mind and body, in unity.
Mind and body, striving for that same blessed space.
Mind and body.... asleep.

Silence

A blessed moment when the player dies on someone's too-loud headphones.
A false pause in someone's tired phone conversation.
A time between thoughts on someone's aging keyboard.

Ah, life after-hours. At work, at the office, on the "chair".

Melamine

It's breakable, did you know? Now I do.

Tamara

Nice name. Bit disconcerting to learn it means "tamarind" in some other land. Yuck. Unromantic.

Paper Rose

One of my best memories is walking into this little pub... one I'd not been to coz of hospitals n other shit... and getting a napkin-rose from the bartender. A thanks for getting back, and welcome.

Lovely paper rose.

It's Funny

How the music plays loudest when you're dropping off to sleep.
How the monkey snatches your hat just before the sun shines through the canopy into your eyes.
How the moment you think it's over, something more's thrown right at you.

Can't seem to laugh.

Note to Self

They don't care. Get that! And stay knowin' it!

Fool on the Hill

Yep.

Travail

Yep, nice word. Better'n calling some things merely travel.

Journey duration: 8 hours
Trips at journey's "end": 7 hours
Onward journey duration: 10 hours
Trips at final destination: 23 hours

Actual sitting around n tripping the light fantastic (u meet people, u (don't) talk...): 4 hours
Sleeping: 4 hours
Recovery time: 24 hours

Nice, relaxing little Rajasthan trip over weekend. Yearning for repeat now.

Emotion

I'd like to make friends at my own pace. Or theirs. But inevitably I'm making friends coz of common loyalties.
Bloody disconcerting to know too much about some people. Bloody weird to find out after that: that you're still really strangers, just know each others' undie colors so well...

Confusion

Me: Wanna visit Manama.
He: A hat?! What?!
Me: That's Panama.
He: Now that, you could visit. See the Canal. Peru, I think...
Me: Deep. But I wanna visit Manama.
He: Still don't get where you're headed. How many people d'u know who wanna visit a hat?!
Me: Oh, ya. That's what I really wanna do. Visit a hat. Middle Eastern cowboys wear it. Bahrain's a type of shopping, no doubt.

I swear this one ain't fiction.

Moment-ary Realization

Me: mes dying... just thot i shld tell so u can arrange for fresh carnations
He: huh?
Me: of course donno when mes dying... but it will happen. inevitable, like taxes. its a feeling that pulls at you like sand gets pulled from beneath yr feet at the shoreline... inexorable, bloody sure to happen!
He: Rest in peace then.

Someday I promise to chat like normal human beings do, about weather and breakfast. But not today. Today is for me.

Mort, Anyone?

If Death can, why can't a poor li'l underpaid corporate cog-in-wheel?

Just three days' exchange of lives, me don't even want years of your time. Please to apply quickly before interviewer loses it completely.

Some cultures frown on single-word answers. They prefer the strip-search.

Hey, you!

Tried anonymity for a while. Didn't cut it.
Tried to rationalize. Didn't fall that way.
Some sing, some sway. Not my beat ever.
Too true, it's for the birds.

Time to show the finger.
Here's to CORPORATE LOYALTY!!!

wtf

wednesday-thursday-friday

Yep, second half of the week alrite.

"Theme" Party

When you're with "new" friends, or the people you "hang out" with, you're always doing stuff. Like... frenetic almost. This coffee shop, that pub, the third shopping mall or theater complex... tiring.

The better the friend, the less you seem to "do" along those lines. Witness the guy who took his first ever plane ride... to sit in a hotel room drinkin the weekend away with an old friend.
I now know what's on TV, don't I...

Or the babe who takes an expensive vacation to Kuala Lumpur.
What you doin there, girlie?
Mostly baby-sittin.

Bet you they have more fun than you do most parties you've ever attended!

Anger

Raw. Absolutely unfiltered. Ahh, feels good to feel so much again.

This one's for all those long-suffering people who keep forcing me to eat my evening meals.

A BIG HUG!!!

Perennials

Herbs r for the bathwater. Or other sweet-smelling bowls cluttering the living room. OK, mebbe they also help cure stuff or make stuff tasty n other such mundane things.

But... trees r for the soul.
Yep. Try it. Sit under one all day. Brilliant!!! Now you know where Newton got it from :)

Walk the walk.
Talk the talk.

Someone tell me what the heck they mean?
The way you walk is IT, aint?

More Cheeba

Slow music.
Wine... or in my case leftover Breezer.
Best friend patiently chatting with me in vain hope of sleep in this decade.

Yep, this the Life at Midnight.
Or was that Evil Dead???

take me away someplace... for the world here lacks that essential ingredient... which to me defines more of survival than the very oxygen we breathe!

TLC

I wish I could give things away. Things like love. Things like hugs.
And wish I could send them at moment's notice anywhere in the world.

What a nice world it would be then.

But... I do my little bit. Hope it helps.

Gimme a coupla hrs...
Just need to work thru the blues...
A few more keys
Another tune
And hey presto... a new tune to cheer the masses!

Cilantroe

Someone told me a bad mood can last up to 3 days.
So much for statistics.

I say, cilantro's much more nutritious than asparagus.
Prove me wrong.

Vulnerable

Glass.

All that talk, and no reprieve from the silence.
All those people and no shelter from the cold.